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Another key concept is “Attraction is Not A Choice”. Ok, to really understand how this all works, you have to have one big underlying belief and frame (mental state) – Attraction is not a choice. Men and women are wired differently (no big surprise there), and we look for subtle cues as we interact, but we do not logically decide who we are attracted too.
I think David DeAngelo said it first, and as I have learned, attraction TRULY isn’t a choice.
So let’s take a look at how most men approach the idea of women and dating.
First, men think they have to be a “nice guy” to a girl so she will like them. WRONG (more on this later). But most guys have the belief they have to be nice to a woman. I’m not sure where all the bullshit of buying a woman presents or treating her nice came from. Probably Hollywood. Opening doors, buying her flowers, pulling out her chair, etc. All of it’s great to do for someone who reciprocates back to you and already desires you – like your wife or long time lover (and still in moderation). But in the beginning, the more you supplicate, the more you are telling her she is the prize, and worth more than you. And that simply will not make her vagina wet and tingle for you.